I've been having a very hard time with these... especially in regards to my family & friends that are in recovery. I have a hard time deciding what boundaries are ok & what ones are just me being manipulative...
Sometimes the more we resist someone the more we get pulled back. Like a chinese finger cuff... the more we pull, the more we get stuck. By relaxing instead of resisting, we set ourselves free. I don't know if I am ready to enforce the boundaries yet, or I would!
I find myself yelling, screaming, etc... I just have to remember that when I'm serious the ones I'm enforcing the boundary with will know it whether I am yelling or whispering.
Does anyone have any ideas regarding strong/safe boundaries for spouses of addicts/mentally ill?